You cannot make me happy

You cannot make me happy. Just like I cannot make you happy. I am not saying this from a place of negativity or animosity - this is from a place of love and kindness. Because as soon as you realise that you are not responsibile for anyone else's happiness - then you will be able to focus on your own.

In a conversation yesterday I realised that many of us have come to believe we have the power and capability to MAKE other people happy. I have done the same - I thought that by being a certain way, showing strength and independence, doing what other people expected of me - that I would make them happy.

This just isn't the case. If someone is not happy with themselves, then nothing is going to magically cause them to be truly happy. No food, no exercise, no amount of gifts, 'things' or complements - nothing will MAKE someone happy unless they are ready for it themselves.

You see, the only person that can make me happy, is ME! Just like the only person that can make you happy is YOU!

Of course, you can support other people and inspire them by doing things that cause great memories and bring happy vibes into their lives, and this is something you should never stop doing. Bringing light into the world is an amazing thing and we can't have too much of that. But by taking on the responsibility to MAKE someone else happy... wow - that is a big thing to take on your shoulders.

I don't want someone else to have to 'try and make me happy'. That is my job, and actually I am doing quite well at that for myself. Yes their support means the world to me, but don't undermine my own capability of making myself happy.

I am stronger than you think. I need to learn this for myself. You can't keep protecting me - because by doing so you are taking away your own happiness - and that has a knock on effect to my own.

When you can release this responsibility for someone else's happiness, you create this wonderful space to focus on your own and you set an example to people around you. You give others the confidence to discover what makes them happy, you create a ripple effect of happiness, that is the only way you can be a catalyst for happiness. You can't force it.

You have to put yourself first.