Her Beauty Does Not Diminish Your Own

Have you ever looked at a beautiful woman and felt a sudden feeling of unworthiness?

I have. Multiple times.

A sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. A part of me that wants to hide. Ashamed of myself. Unworthy. Defeated. A longing to be something, or someone, other than all that I was.

I used to see someone else’s beauty as a mirror to all that I wasn’t.

It was an opportunity to point out my flaws and highlight the things I felt insecure about.

It was as though I felt like there wasn’t enough beauty to go round - that this other woman had all of it and I had none.

It caused me to shrink. To hide myself away.

However when I became aware of this pattern I could begin to unpick it and free myself of this painful comparison habit.

I realised that beauty is not only infinite, but it is also everywhere and in everyone. Including me.

The beauty we see in someone else is merely a reflection of our own beauty.

Our eyes see beauty because we ARE beauty.

The belief of what beauty actually is needs redefining. The current world leads us to believe that beauty only looks a certain way. Particularly when it comes to people’s image.

A certain shape. A certain size. A certain hair colour. A certain skin colour.

This has become so ‘normal’ that we can’t always see it and the impact it has on us. It has become part of our foundations and we need to uproot it.

We need to see it first - the toxicity, the lies that we have been told.

Awareness comes before action.

Unlearning takes time, patience and courage.

It is not just surface deep, it’s roots run deep.

It isn’t always comfortable.

If the experience arises…

• Notice and acknowledge the part of you that feels ‘less than’.

• Bring extra compassion to that part of you. Send her tender sweet love.

• Let the appreciation of her beauty be an opportunity to appreciate your own beauty - instead of criticise yourself.

• Repeat. As many times as it takes.

These reflections are beautiful chances given to us to return to love - over, and over, and over again.

Consider a different perspective

Instead of feeling like you are constantly being reminded of the things you struggle to accept - maybe you are being invited to constantly return to love. To your heart. To your home.

Please hear me when I tell you… her beauty does not diminish your own.

Lx